Category: Relationships

There we stood in the middle of our life, caught up in the undertow of our past, struggling to make sense of the present. God was giving us hope for the future.

We both came through this life collecting things that we had learned. Some things were taught to us by our parents, other things were from generations long ago from people we had never met before.

We came from two different worlds, together we needed to sort through everything and allow God to show us the way out of the mess we were living in.

Tony was an only child, raised by his mother and step father. Lessons of love and life seemed to go untaught. His family was quiet and rarely spoke even if they were all in the same room. Things were often swept under the rug as a means of moving on. This was their normal.

I was raised by a father who was abusive, he controlled everything about my life. He was a master manipulator and a deceiver at best. We had big family secrets and were taught to be quiet, never to tell of things done in the dark.

Continue reading “Face To Face ( marriage series week 5)” →

 

After years of struggling to understand this life that had spun into a web of lies, I found myself angry , impatient, and moving through life on auto pilot with my children.

Tony and I bounced in and out of counseling. He wasn’t completely ready or willing to be honest nor was he done in his pursuit with pornography, marijuana, and lying.

We were 2 days into the new year. I kept telling myself  “The new year is your favorite time Jame,  you get to start all over. Be happy.”

My body felt heavy and everything seemed to be covered by a dark cloud that followed. We had just dropped our oldest daughter off at work.Trying to seem happy and polite I asked Tony, “So what do you think this new year will bring us?”  His  frigid reply was, “Whatever you want it to bring. You’re in control, I’m just here for the ride.”

His words pierced me. I pulled the car into the nearest parking lot, turned the engine off, unbuckled my seat belt and turned to face him, my voice stern and loud. “Are you kidding me?”

It was during that fight he informed me that he would be leaving. He had decided to take a job on another Island. He would send the money home to pay for everything, he was done!

“Done?” I retorted, “You can’t be done, you don’t get to be done!” I was now screaming in protest of his decision! He shut me out and I continued with rage of brutal words gushing from my hurt filled heart.

Continue reading “Life Among The Ruins (Marriage Series: week 4)” →

We were married for two years and eight months, when we found out we were going to have a baby.

Hours before finding out the wonderful news, we had been in a fight. But it wasn’t one of the usual fights like a misunderstanding, or a “I forgot to do something I said I would do” kind of fight. It was different. I felt something strange between us, I saw something different in his eyes.

When you’re young newlyweds, everyday that goes by makes you feel proud and kind of grown-up like. Going on three years felt like eternity, I believed I had it all figured out.

At least I thought I did?

There between us hung a web of deceit, a thread of lies that had no beginning or end. Continue reading “Coming Out Of The Darkness (Marriage Series: week 3)” →

The first year of marriage came with a lot of first-time things for us. Like our first kiss, our first airplane ride, the first time we walked on the beach hand in hand and our first real fight.

I remember it well. There we were two people in love and in a disagreement over where we were going to live, a fight began. I didn’t like the way he spoke to me and he didn’t like that I wasn’t going to agree with everything he said. Honestly, I remember thinking, “I don’t like this.” Continue reading “A First Time For Everything (Marriage Series: week 2)” →

This is the story of he and me.

I was a simple girl full of hope, that no matter what happened today it will be better tomorrow.

He was full of life. Fearless is what I remember.

It started with his glance and my smile and there began the story of us.

“God has a plan for me,” were the words I spoke to my heart day after day. Through sunshine and rain I carried that hope like an umbrella that was always open.

We met on Easter Sunday the year was 1984. It was like someone had stirred our hearts awake. We had been attending the same church for a few years but it was that day that we saw each other. With a quick introduction, a handshake, and a smile. We were captivated.

Our first date followed many other dates but we had never shared a kiss. Continue reading “The Story Of Us ( marriage series week 1)” →

This is the story of long ago. The love we shared. The great struggles we overcame and the One God that brought us through it all. For the next few weeks On the sea of his grace, invites you into our life as we open up to give you a closer look. This is not for gossip or judgment, nor is it to brag or expose secret sins. Both my husband and I have prayed and agreed to share our journey for the sake of encouragement and praise for all God has done in our lives and in our marriage.

In the weeks to come, if you find that you relate to some of our struggles, our hope is that you realize that God wants to set you free. He is asking you to trust him.  He wants to give you the kind of love and marriage he created you for.  Prayerfully join us and experience God’s redemption in this relationship that was once shattered by lies and addiction. Continue reading “The Beginning (A marriage series)” →

 

He stood before me six feet 2 inches tall. In his arms he held our third baby girl. I remember this day as if it were yesterday. She was just a few weeks old. She was tiny. I watched as she tried to stretch her neck out and hold her head up as though she was taking a look at the world from up there in her daddy’s arms. Continue reading “Isn’t She Lovely ( A Tribute To My Baby Girl, All Grown Up)” →