The Story Of Us ( marriage series week 1)


This is the story of he and me.

I was a simple girl full of hope, that no matter what happened today it will be better tomorrow.

He was full of life. Fearless is what I remember.

It started with his glance and my smile and there began the story of us.

“God has a plan for me,” were the words I spoke to my heart day after day. Through sunshine and rain I carried that hope like an umbrella that was always open.

We met on Easter Sunday the year was 1984. It was like someone had stirred our hearts awake. We had been attending the same church for a few years but it was that day that we saw each other. With a quick introduction, a handshake, and a smile. We were captivated.

Our first date followed many other dates but we had never shared a kiss.

It was almost the end of summer and the night sky was filled with fireflies. It was almost magical. Crossing the old railroad tracks he learned over and whispered “I love you.”  those words made my heart come alive. I too loved him and spoke those words back.

He left a few weeks later for Colorado to attend bible college. Our love was shared over time with hand written letters and phone calls. It was so easy to be carried away by love. I dreamed of forever with him. There were days that my heart ached missing him.

It’s funny how we can remember the past but at the same time not realize that it is our past that carves out the bends in the road that leads us to our destination if we are not careful.

I saved every letter and note that he sent to me. Day and night I prayed for him and he for me. It was a beautiful beginning.

We took each step with careful planning to honor God and each other. It’s one of the sweetest things I hold close to my heart.  It wasn’t popular then and might not be now. But we both believed,

“True love waits.”

God’s word is filled with powerful scriptures of why God values this action. We waited to kiss on our wedding day not because it made us more holy. We waited to make love on our honeymoon not because it made us better people. We waited because We both wanted God’s blessing in our lives.

We became the talk in our church community. On August 3, 1985 at 12:00 noon that body of believers along with our family and friends came to celebrate with us as we committed our lives to each other. Standing before God and these witnesses, a miracle was taking place and little did we realize the journey we were about to step into.

I, a wide-eyed bride and he an adventurous groom. We boarded the plane and headed to Hawaii my home town, where we would spend the next 16 months getting to know each other.

That was a long time ago.

It’s been a rough road and a very long journey to where we are today.

Do you remember the story of how you met your beloved? Retell that story to yourself and find the moment when your heart came to life. There was a time and a reason for your marriage and rather you are still together or not doesn’t define you. It’s the lessons  you’ve learned along the way and the ones you may still need to learn.

One of my favorite books I’ve read concerning marriage is call,  “Sacred marriage” by Gary Thomas.

On the cover of his book he writes,

“What if God designed marriage to make you holy more than to make us happy“.

In all our struggles, God was trying to make us more like him.

But our views were different and we began to see our true selves and so the battle began.

For most of you, I don’t really know where you are in your marriage. But I do know that we have a God who sees.

There were years of sweetness in our marriage and years I played pretend just to get through the day.

God gives us all a choice to be like him or to be ourselves. He has the power to uncover secrets and to bind up our wounds. He has the strength to heal and to make new. The question is, are you willing to obey his words and surrender your thoughts, your dreams, and desires of what you thought marriage was for the kind of marriage God designed.

Mine and Tony’s greatest struggle was learning to live in the reality of who we both were and who God was making us to be. In heaven we won’t be married to each other so while we’re here on earth in this marriage it’s about learning to be intimate with God and that becomes the source that overflows God’s goodness toward each other.

The hope of our story is not to make you fall in love with your spouse or to stir up the butterfly feelings. Our prayer is that you fall deeper in love with your God and you learn to be intimate with him.

May the God of our hearts breathe life into our marriages today. May he be the love of our lives and the hope of our future. I pray you draw closer to the Father as he shows you what he can do when your heart is surrendered.

Longing To Be Made Holy,

~ Jamie





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